officialprydonchapter:

dragon-in-a-fez:

officialprydonchapter:

How do you write healthy parent-child relationships?

this might be more response than you want, but interesting (and kinda depressing when you think about it) fact: there’ve been a bunch of research studies where parents have been asked what they think makes a healthy parent-child relationship, and they tend to like…not answer the actual question because they think they’re being asked what good parenting is, which is not the same. so they talk about things like helping kids with homework and making sure they eat well. children, on the other hand, usually respond to the same question with stuff that’s literally just the definition of healthy relationships generally. affection, honesty, respect, spending time together, sharing interests. and the real kicker is, objectively, we know that’s the kind of stuff that actually has a much better impact not only on whether or not the relationship is strong and positive but also the kid’s overall happiness and psychological health.

so, if you want to write a character who’s really intent on being a Good Parent you’d have them putting massive effort into making their kid Grow Up Right, worrying about shit like if they have The Right Friends and they’re spending Enough Time Outside. but if you want to write a good relationship, just make parent and kid laugh together and respect boundaries and be emotionally supportive, like you would when writing a solid pair of friends or romantic couple.

No that was actually really helpful and I’m glad you took the time to give a serious response

tselina:

brynwrites:

Making your angst hurt: the power of lighthearted scenes. 

I’m incredibly disappointed with the trend in stories (especially ‘edgy’ YA novels) to bombard the reader with traumatic situations, angry characters, and relationship drama without ever first giving them a reason to root for a better future. As a reader…

• I might care that the main siblings are fighting if they had first been shown to have at least one happy, healthy conversation. 

• I might cry and rage with the protagonist if I knew they actually had the capacity to laugh and smile and be happy.

• I might be hit by heavy and dark situations if there was some notion that it was possible for this world to have light and hope and joy to begin with.

Writers seem to forget that their reader’s eyes adjust to the dark. If you want to give your reader a truly bleak situation in a continually dim setting, you have to put them in pitch blackness. But if you just shine a light first, the sudden change makes the contrast appear substantial.

Show your readers what light means to your character before taking it away. Let the reader bond with the characters in their happy moments before (and in between) tearing them apart. Give readers a future to root for by putting sparks of that future into the past and the present. Make your character’s tears and anger mean something.

Not only will this give your dark and emotional scenes more impact, but it says something that we as humans desperately, desperately need to hear. 

Books with light amidst the darkness tell us that while things are hard and hurt, that we’re still allowed to breathe and hope and live and even laugh within the darkness.

We as humans need to hear this more often, because acting it out is the only way we stop from suffocating long enough to make a difference.

So write angst, and darkness, and gritty, painful stories, full of treacherous morally grey characters if you want to. But don’t forget to turn the light on occasionally.

Support Bryn’s ability to provide writing advice by reading their debut novel, an upbeat fantasy about a bloodthirsty siren fighting to return home while avoiding the lure of a suspiciously friendly and eccentric pirate captain!

^^^THIS^^^^

eshusplayground:

eshusplayground:

eshusplayground:

1. Don’t characterize a Black character as sassy or thuggish, especially when the character in question is can be described in literally ten thousand other ways..
2. Don’t describe Black characters as chocolate, coffee, or any sort of food item.
3. Don’t highlight the race of Black characters (ie, “the dark man” or “the brown woman”) if you don’t highlight the race of white characters.
4. Think very carefully about that antebellum slavery or Jim Crow AU fic as a backdrop for your romance.
5. If you’re not fluent with AAVE, don’t use it to try to look cool or edgy. You look corny as hell.
6. Don’t use Black characters as a prop for the non-Black characters you’re actually interested in.
7. Keep “unpopular opinions” about racism, Black Lives Matter, and other issues pertinent to Black folks out the mouths of Black characters. We know what the fuck you’re doing with that and need to stop.
8. Don’t assume a Black character likes or hates a certain food, music, or piece of pop culture.
9. You can make a Black character’s race pertinent without doing it like this.
10. Be extremely careful about insinuating that one or more of a Black character’s physical features are dirty, unclean, or ugly.

Feel free to add more.

Adding more…

1. Be wary of making Black characters seem animalistic, uncivilized, or subhuman in comparison to white characters. Watch out for: comparing us to monkeys, gorillas, chimpanzees, apes, and other animals.
2. Words like Negroid, colored/colured, Negro, and the n-word do not belong in the mouths of contemporary characters you want to portray as sympathetic.
3. Not all Black people are African American.
4. Africa is not a country but the second-largest continent on earth with some 54 different countries with thousands of ethnic groups and 1,500 to 3,000 languages and dialects.
5. Resist the urge to make a Black character seem uneducated and ignorant compared to white characters.
6. Capitalizing Black shows that you recognize that the word unifying people of African descent, particularly the diaspora, should be described using a proper noun.
7. Please, say “Black people,” not “blacks.”
8. Give Black characters the same psychological and moral complexity as white men are given by default.
9. Make sure that you don’t write a Black character as happily subservient to a white character.
10. Understand and show that you understand that Black characters don’t exist to be the caretakers of white characters.

And more…

1. Do your own homework instead of expecting, asking, or demanding Black fans to do it.
2. Before approaching that Black person you admire so much for being so articulate about race issues (this is sarcasm) to beta read your work: 1) make sure it’s something they’ve expressed interest in doing, and 2) you offer something in return for their time and expertise.
3. Be prepared for fans to have issues with what you came up with and open to suggestions.
4. Having only one Black character in a story that takes place in a huge city, country, or galaxy looks weird. Really, really weird. Scary weird.
5. Don’t use a Black character’s death to motivate a white character.
6. Portray Black characters with complex and multifaceted identities. We are more than just Black. We are also women, LGBT, Jewish, disabled, neurodivergent, immigrants, etc.
7. There is a huge chasm between hypersexual and desexualized.
8. Remember: what’s progressive for a white character is not necessarily progressive for a Black one.