You know just how long 2018 has been? You know how long?
Did you even remember there was an Olympic games this year? Because I didn’t. I thought oh, last year. No. There was a winter Olympics in Korea and I forgot about it.
You know how long this year has been? The tide pod thing happened in January of this year
The royal wedding was only in May I am so upset
love simon came out this year hhh
Black Panther came out this year too
i swear this year was like 5 years long or something
so this might seem dumb but its helped a lot instead of saying “i wanna die” in normal conversation or like in my head in response to minor inconveniences like even as a joke, saying “i wanna go to bed” has like. improved my life tenfold no joke
me, late 20s, discovering i love to cook, and have neck pain: holy shit i’m going to turn into a person who does yoga
me, buying paper napkins and eyebanging a herb garden: i’m having an identity crisis
me: *reaches automatically for coaster, catches sight of my reflection in my newly purchased wine glasses that were on sale*: i don’t know who you are anymore
“i’m not a fan of embellishments on throw pillows, they tend to snag” I say, and gasp in horror at what I’ve become
“Did you know they make odorized garbage bags now?” I say without flinching, the sclerae of my eyes as black and ashen as my soul
QUESTION 1: Your wife, the mother of your children, is drowning. You have a life preserver. However, a customer requires your assistance. What do you do?
QUESTION 2: A man has been caught stealing from the company and he is currently awaiting execution. You are the executioner. Do you pull the trigger?
QUESTION 3: Which sentence best describes yourself?
– I have clinical depression.
– I’m ready to be productive!
QUESTION 4: Which sentence best describes yourself?
– I try to do things to the best of ability.
– I am willing to bleed for you.
QUESTION 5: Are you afraid to die?
QUESTION 6: Please attach your resumé as a PDF.
QUESTION 7: Please type your entire resumé into the text box below (1000 character limit).
Hey guys, this is for you digital artists out there.
My friends have created this site for tracking your images, it’s called copypants.com.
It sucks finding people who repost your art without crediting you. On top of finding your images, Copypants acts as a middleman for interacting with the reposters. They make it really easy to send credit requests to people reposting your work.
cards against humanity not only buying part of the U.S border to stop trump from building the wall between the U.S and Mexico but also hiring a law firm specializing in eminent domain with the intent of making it harder and more expensive for the government to build the wall has got to be the boldest move in this stupid simulation we’re living in. not all heroes wear capes
Astronaut bird 